boysordeath's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Sex swing In the past few years I have often accepted sex in place of love. This led me down dire paths that found me in a relationship with a 40 year old man who had been "separated" from his wife for a year. They had 3 kids and were getting a divorce but just doing so slowly to have a healthy transition for the kids. (Blowing whistle right here!) Nope. Turns out, actually, he was married, all married, no separation about it, and he had SIX kids, mind you, SIX kids; the last of which was a baby his wife was still nursing when he started having an affair with me. I knew none of this. He sent me a sex swing in the mail from his "vacation with his boys" that turned out to be a full on family vacation, along with a package every other day with generic souvenirs inside. E.g., playboy bunny panties (I tried not to judge him cus he was 40) and shot glasses with sayings like, "I'll Out Drink All You Bitches." I thought then he just had kind of an old dorky sense of humor--which I found endearing. I almost wrote that "eventually I didn't" but then I realized that wasn't true--I liked that we were different--I liked that he was different from any of the guys I had dated my age that were totally identified with who they thought they were based around "what" they liked in way of music, art, clothes, etc. But I eventually broke up with him after 2 or 3 months cus things didn't add up and I slowly (by ignoring little clues here and there and telling myself to not jump to conclusions) admitted to myself that he was not separated. Though he denied it over and over, even calling his wife his "ex-wife" (for good measure) in my presence and in emails. A full year later after we had broken up (in which I'd had no contact with him until he sent me an email apologizing for being dishonest and not giving me the truth so that I could have made that choice in full consciousness rather than being tricked into being a home wrecker and mistress) I got a phone call from his wife--which was a little less than a year ago currently. But it turns out those were her souvenirs he sent to me from their family vacation (that he claimed his wife did not go on--he even went to the trouble to keep her out of all his vacation photos, or he went through and picked out the ones she wasn't in to show me). He told her that her souvenirs must have gotten lost in all the traveling and staying with different family members on the way home. She asked for them back from me, but I'd thrown all of it away--which was the truth--I didn't want any reminders of him after I broke up with him--I felt ashamed just thinking about it and my worst fear was that his wife would come after me and try to ruin my life like I had ruined hers. But the point is--I guess she's the one who is into playboy panties and dorky humor shot glasses...I'll say that as strange as the situation was, I actually kind of like the lady. But as I said--another story for another time. In the meantime, I gave the sex swing to some friends--I don't know if I was all in on the sex swing anyway. I think that's more of a mid-life crisis venture and I just wasn't and still am not there yet. Sex without equipment in need of assembly to use is still just good enough for lil ol me. 5:55 p.m. - 2012-03-07 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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